Here we are again how fast these months seem to come to pass. Well this new happiness habit is one that is on my priority list for our family to utilise.
For June we will be LETTING GO. Sounds good right, easy even? Or does it sound like a real toughie? In my home I would really like to help Hero with letting things go. He can hold on to things that he deems as bad for him and can lead to all kinds of tension within the family.
Who couldn’t benefit from a little more letting go of negativity? As with most happiness habits they take time to take hold but can become seemingly automatic. It’s like a muscle that you don’t often use, it will seem strange or difficult at first (may not), but with more practise then it becomes easier.
Why letting go? If you become good at this you will be a happier mum that’s why! It’s funny that we ‘let things pass’ and all too soon we find ourselves snapping or exploding at our partner or children. When we look at the reason it’s usually not the thing that occurred that caused the big emotion but more like it was the last straw.
From the outside it can look like mum has gone potty over a small incident but we know that’s not how it goes. On the inside we have been holding on to many little negative feelings we’ve collected throughout the day. For instance we run late in the morning and hold on to the frustration of that.
We seem to catalogue all the “bad” things that happen during the day – the baby was clingy so I couldn’t do my house work. The children were arguing even when I’d given them a treat etc, etc. We face situations like these many times and each time we have a simple choice.
To let it go, accept that it’s done and carry on, or to take hold. To judge it as bad or wrong and keep a pocket of those negative feelings with us. Of course the latter leads to more and more pockets of negativity and of course when we run out of pockets and one more thing happens that we see as “bad” we use all the negativity collected to let it out.
There is obviously a different way to let go of the negative emotions but we have to make that decision. It’s gonna come out one way or another so we let it go, if we feel it. If we judge things as bad for us that’s when we feel bad. This is when to practice letting things go. Of course we don’t have to judge things as bad for us but that’s for another time.
- The last thing we want is to go from being a loving mom to, for no real reason, biting the heads off our family. This doesn’t help with our happiness because we then feel bad about our actions. Letting go will help us be happier and our families.
How to let go?
Here are a few ideas.
• Ask yourself How does it serve you to hold on to this feeling?
• Counting yourself happy, have a moment to focus on counting while letting go of everything else.
• Practise when something happens and you feel bad try to let it go straight away. Visualise it evaporating instead of sitting in the pockets.
• Blow it out with calm deep breaths of the out send out the feelings you don’t want.
Take a small step towards this skill.
Dont expect to be perfect, allow yourself to trip. You can’t fail if you don’t give up.
Choose a different habit for you to add to your life if it will better fit your family. If you want to include your children that is wonderful. Have a chat and discuss ways you could work together or remind each other not to hold on to the negative. Remember to fill in a worksheet to keep your focus.
If you come up with other ideas to integrate this let me know!